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HAUSMAN COMEDY: Bio

Jon L. Hausman

Jon Hausman has worked at a Nuclear Laboratory for the last 20 years, and has been doing Stand-Up comedy for the last 3 of them. He spent the first 17 years gathering material.

Jon survived the Albany (NY) public school system, including Wm. S. Hackett Jr. High School and Albany High School, both of which are prominently listed among New York State's WORST schools, so honored for their low graduation rates, rampant violence, and a virtual epidemic of teenage pregnancies.

He earned a B. Sci (cum laude) in Chemistry from Union College in Schenectady, NY, and a Ph.D. in Chemical Engineering from Penn State. All this has been a mistake, as he really wanted to attend Hudson Valley Community College after high school and study Auto Mechanics with his friends, but Union offered a scholarship and his mother said he had to take it for reasons that to this day make no sense.

He married his high-school sweetheart in 1982, and she has followed him through Graduate School, the Nuclear Lab, and most everywhere else he goes. Realizing that he will not get rich through Science or Engineering, she is gambling that the Stand-Up thing will pay off someday. Silly girl.

Jon regularly emcees at The Funny Farm in Gloversville. He likes it because the food there is excellent; the headline acts like him because he gets their Intros. right and he manages to get laughs during warm-up so the crowd is "ready".

Jon is billed as "The Funniest Engineer On The East Coast". He was formerly known as "The Greatest Jewish Welterweight in Albany, NY", until his weight gain out of that class and the emergence of a second Jewish welterweight in the Albany area forced him to look for another moniker.

Jon Hausman can be thought of as "The John McCain of Comedy", although he AND Senator McCain would prefer that he not be called that. Nevertheless, he IS an older white guy that no one wants to listen to, so there are a few similarities. Mr. McCain has better hair, by virtue of having hair.

Jon Hausman was held captive by the Albany Public School System in questionable inner-city schools, which in many ways is similar to John McCain being held captive by the North Vietnamese in a prison camp, except that the cafeteria food at Albany High was worse. On the other hand, at least the captives at Albany High never had to put up with a publicity stunt visit from Jane Fonda like the tortured souls in the Vietnamese POW camps. OK - so we ducked THAT one.

Marcy Hausman

Marcy is usually characterized as a "nice" lady, keeping in mind that "nice" is a four-letter word. Years of work experience with daycares, antique dealers, and social service organizations - as well as 25 years of marriage to member of a previously unknown evolutionary branch - have left her with a gritty view of the world which shocks most audience members and even many incarcerated homicide practitioners.


Jokin' Jonny Moocow

Jokin' Jonny Moocow was born on Delbert's Farm in 2005. His mother was a former model for the Ben & Jerry's corporation; according to the photo, his father appears to have been a latex glove and some sort of turkey-baster contraption.

His education consists of learning not to press his nose against the electric fence. It's not much, but he's learned it awfully well.

Jokin' Jonny Moocow performs a memorable act consisting of cow-related one-liners.

His hero is Arnold The Pig, who overcame his speech impediment to become famous on TV's "Green Acres". This is in contrast to actress Eva Gabor from that same show, who never overcame HER speech problem and never became famous either (unlike her big sister Zsa Zsa), and also in contrast to TV horse Mr. Ed, who, tragically, had to have his lines dubbed in later by a voice-over.

Jokin' Jonny Moocow's likes and dislikes:
His LIKES include salt licks, stampedes, and those rodeos where the rider is tossed off in about half a second. His DISLIKES include artificial insemination, barbecue sauce, and dollar menus.

Jokin' Jonny Moocow is available for stud service or childrens' parties. He absolutely refuses to perform any venues where the two skills are somehow intertwined by perverted humans. Either can be arranged for a few sugar cubes. Watch your hand.